Monday, August 24, 2009

The Show Must Go On. Even if you suck.



Thank the goodness for Facebook. Without it, I would not have come across this article by our theatrical Perez Hilton, Michael Riedel. Now, the NY Post is not really what I would call "a news source," but it's fun to thumb through for the bold words and fun pictures, because you know, seeing the leader of the free world in swimming trunks is at the forefront of bipartisanship.

Riedel is a Broadway columnist for the Post and recently wrote an article pertaining to the amount of people calling in sick for the Broadway production of "West Side Story," citing, and I quote, "injuries, illnesses, vocal troubles, blah, blah, blah." His angle is "Don't cross the Boss," as he describes 91-year old writer/director, Arthur Laurents, riding in on his high horse...well, hopefully not that high--I mean, he could break something getting off it (Cheap joke? Yes. True Statement? Yes.)...and coming down on the actors and stating they had better show up more often or find another job.

Look, if I didn't see this production, or more importantly, didn't hear information from the receiving end of Mr. Laurents' "riot act", perhaps I wouldn't care as much. But, I feel that I need to speak for professional theatre personnel. There are people who will read this article in the Tri-State area, or beyond, and have a very bad taste in their mouth for Broadway talent. Furthermore, they will use this as a cautionary tale when they stage their community theatre production in Blaine, Missouri. "Don't be like those kids in 'West Side Story' on Broadway. Like Ron Lee said, 'bloodied and bowed, you crawled on stage.' It doesn't matter that your audience paid to see dancing and you gave them bloodied crawling--get out there and be the best crawler you can be!"

The Actor's Equity Association was established to protect professionals in the theatre business. Look, I know the show must go on. And that's exactly what understudies are for. So, if you are sick, a family member dies, you get shin splints and can't walk for a week, or you (God forbid) get married and have a honeymoon, the show CAN go on without you. In most "regular" jobs, people are allotted sick days, personal days, vacation days, and in some instances, mental health days! Why are performers and technicians, who work more days (Count 'em, 6. Every week, 'til the show closes) than corporate America not allowed the same? Because, you know what, sometimes you need to have a break. Because the argument against the "we paid all this money to see the original cast" rant is this: What if you paid all that money to see the original cast, and they were sick? But, to be the "work horses of old," they went on anyway? And they blew dog because they were performing with pneumonia? How cheated would you feel then?

This cast busted their ass not only with this show, but with the billion press events surrounding it since before it opened. So, no, they are not only working 3 hours a day. They devote mountains of time and energy to this every single day. Because they are paid to do so--just like an accountant for Price-Waterhouse is paid to bust his ass crunching numbers all day, every day. But, sometimes Mr. Accountant gets sick and can't come to work because he knows that not only will he be doing a disservice to his health, he will be doing a disservice to his co-workers and clients (the people who pay for his service) because he will not be at his best. But, Mr. Accountant may not have someone waiting for the chance to do his job for the day. Mr. Broadway Actor does.

When you are doing a show of this magnitude, getting this attention (for better or worse), you want to be at your best every time. And when grandpa keeps ragging on you because it's not like it was "in my day," it cuts the soul a bit. And now you're afraid to call out of work because you have swine flu, but if you come in, you infect everyone else. The A-Man's got the WSS cast by the balls. And look, if he's just a crazy old coot (I'm not saying he is, I'm saying if he is), it doesn't matter because he owns the show! He can pull the plug at any time! The producers can't even override him. The best they can do is apologize for him should the need arise.

Do people take advantage of sick/personal days on Broadway? I do not doubt that. But, has there been a time where you called out sick when you weren't? Be honest. I'm not saying it's right, I'm saying it happens. So, save the Piven parallels. Jeremy Piven signed a contract and welched on it. This is about Broadway production contracts which actually have time off written in. And when you are literally sweating and bleeding on stage 8 times a week, you might need more than just one Monday to recover.

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